:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
