I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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