there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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