you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
