His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
