carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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