margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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