2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
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