i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize
