FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Randomize
