I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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