therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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