First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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