next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
