At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I think pants incapable of making pants work
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
