Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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