I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize