I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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