But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize