I want to stick my p in your. b.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
