I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
