I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
