seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize