ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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