The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
