he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Randomize
