Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
