I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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