But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Randomize
