its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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