is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
