Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
