Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I need a burrito and a hug.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
