Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
