I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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