I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
