4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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