Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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