I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
