I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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