Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
