I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize