loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize