So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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