yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
