you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
