Reggie can tackle my bush.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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