Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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