No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize