I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
